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First, it is necessary to take a practical part in the upbringing of your offspring, to teach him the basic lessons of life, without dumping this honorable mission on educators, teachers and relatives.
Refrain from being rude and humiliating. It is no secret that sometimes children with their disobedience and stubbornness drive their parents out of themselves, and it can be very difficult to restrain themselves. Having shouted at a child, adults often regret it, but it can be very difficult to correct the situation, and the success of this action is doubtful: reacting to emotions, children do not hear their parents, closing and withdrawing into themselves. Children remember well both tenderness and kindness and resentment from the closest people, which does not add harmony to the family and trust in the world.
How it works
Explain your actions. Children have a natural desire to resist things that they do not understand, and the task of parents is to convey to the child the expediency of their actions, so that over time he will also evaluate his actions: why he does it and why these actions are necessary. Try to be more restrained about children’s misconduct, “sorting them out” and discussing options.
Discuss family matters with the child and ask for his or her opinion. The family is united by feelings, interests, ideals, attitude to life, and so that the child shares your views, makes his own contribution, it is important to attach him to them. This is a great way to teach your child to make decisions and take responsibility for them. Joint activities and common goals not only bring people together, but also contribute to a deeper and more sensitive understanding of each other.
Listen to the child. What the child tells you is not nonsense, it is what he paid attention to, what interests him or worries him, or seemed interesting. It is in conversations that people recognize each other. Listen and get to know your child, notice what his life is filled with: upbringing requires careful study. Praise your child when he is truthful and honest with you, even if the truth is not to your taste.
Lead by example. A personal example is the best way to convey to the child the importance of your requirements, because you yourself are doing what you ask your son or daughter. Children learn healthy habits in the family, and in the future, the likelihood of adopting bad habits is low.
Professor Robert Epstein, the lead research psychologist at the American Institute for Behavioral Research and Technology, California, has identified the traits of good parenting by analyzing research over the past half-century on parenting.
The love of good parents is manifested not only directly in this feeling, but also in caring, participation, in the amount of time spent with children, in hugs, kisses and affectionate words.
Ability to control oneself. The ability to remain calm in all situations and to be in control of your actions is a necessary quality for responsible parents. As role models, they teach their children to experience hardships and to be optimistic about the world.
Relationship between parents. These relationships are as important as the relationship of parents to a child: based on their example, he will build his family in the future, and what it will depend on dad and mom.
Independence and autonomy are expressed in respect for your child, acceptance of his temperament, abilities, understanding of needs and desires.
Education and training. If parents constantly master something new, are interested in modern achievements, provide an opportunity for the child to develop, then he will take an example from them and strive for self-development and improvement, paying little attention to stupidity.
The ability to survive is the ability to make money, manage finances competently and teach this to a child.
Health. By taking care of the health of their family and leading a healthy lifestyle, parents can hope that their child will not acquire a lot of bad habits.
Safety. Responsible parents not only protect their child from injury, but also shield them from dangerous acquaintances and activities. This is especially true these days.
Most importantly, being a good parent is a job that never gets done. Mothers and fathers in one way or another influence the lives of their children, and the future of the child depends on how consciously they approach this.
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