Bullying and Discrimination of Gays in Society

Social repression and discrimination against gays occur in many forms such as verbal abuse, ridicule, rape of gays or lesbians by individuals of the opposite gender, and forced marriage. These crimes are perpetrated with or without state involvement. Forced medication and criminalization of homosexuality lead to these evils, which in turn damage and disrupt the social life and psyche of gays. The author voices and articulates the struggles of gays in this novel at various points. The acceptance of homosexuality greatly varies across different cultures.

Views on homosexuality in India remain rigid. Societal acceptance is a distant dream for gay couples who wish to live together and start their own families. When asked if homosexuality is 'justifiable' or 'acceptable,' Indians tend to remain silent on the issue. Rao depicts the shameful attitude of society towards a gay man harassed by his own friends and acquaintances. Every gay man encounters unique challenges comparable to the struggles that heterosexual individuals face, but the nature of these problems differs. From disowning to physical violence, job denial to blackmail, and from anxiety and depression to suicidal tendencies, these ordeals are all too common in a gay individual's life.

The bullying of effeminate men is a major problem. Bullies can even include one’s own friends, who might imitate the voices and gestures of homosexuals. There's a strong correlation between bullying and suicidal behavior. Bullying, which is often endured by girls and effeminate boys, can lead to anxiety and psychological distress. The protagonist of the novel's refusal to entertain suicidal thoughts suggests his maturity and educational background. And, by accepting himself, he is not consumed by provoking circumstances that could threaten his life. His age also plays a role in his ability to cope with such challenges.

Verbal assault is another significant issue faced by gay individuals. The author, in many instances in the novel, uses the derogatory term 'chhakka' for gays and transsexuals. This reflects the Indian population's naïvety about gender. Despite being in a relationship with Yudi, Milind often uses abusive language towards his partner. Most gays endure such situations where they are forced to disregard the insults to maintain their relationships or sexual satisfaction or out of sheer helplessness. When Milind learns that Yudi has visited his parents in his absence and offered prayers at Chaitya Bhoomi, he becomes enraged. His mother compares Yudi to David and Pramod, Milind's more stereotypically masculine friends, and describes Yudi as 'womanly.' She is more concerned for him than his entire family. In his anger and rage, Milind feels humiliated by his friends and family because of his 'chhakka' partner. His worst fear begins to unravel; his family might suspect his sexuality and think he is also a 'chhakka.' He blames Yudi for ruining his life. He believes Yudi is the reason he revealed his homosexuality, joined A.K. Modelling Agency, became a male prostitute, and why he questions whether he'll be able to lead a normal, married life.

The trainee police officer, Dnyaneshwar, blackmails Yudi and demands money. Yudi escapes from his trap because he isn't ashamed of himself and deliberately doesn't hide his identity like others in the gay community. The police officer believes that men are only intimate with men when women aren't present and that all men are straight by default. Rao clears up this misconception about homosexuality. When Milind returns to Yudi in the final chapter, he contemplates demanding a consistent allowance from Yudi. He attempts to use blackmail to accomplish this, but it's ineffective due to Yudi's openness about his sexual orientation. The specter of blackmail, from being the blackmailer to being blackmailed, haunts Milind due to a past event. When Yudi and Milind married at Mate House, Yudi, adorned in a chiffon sari, became the bride while Milind acted as the groom, placing sindoor on Yudi's forehead. After promising lifetime partnership, they posed for a photo in front of an automatic camera. Following this significant event, Milind began to fear potential blackmail from Yudi and the studio that would develop the photo. Throughout his life, the fear of blackmail lingered within the gay community.

In this heteronormative society, homosexuals and transgender individuals are often considered disgraces to their families and to society in general. Parents struggle to understand their grown children who may not share their heterosexual preferences. This alienation is a primary reason why many gays and lesbians remain closeted. Traditional values play a large part in the acceptance of gay individuals. These values are typically based on religious beliefs, views on marriage and children, and the level of education within the family. The depiction of drag queens in the novel indicates an acceptance in upper-class society. Families with fewer traditional values and higher social status tend to be more open-minded and are more likely to accept their homosexual sons and daughters.

Analyzing the initial conversation between Yudi and Milind, we find that Yudi was open about his sexual orientation with his friends and journalists but not with his aging mother. His mother hoped Yudi would marry someone like Gauri and live a happy life. Many people in society are in denial and don't believe homosexuality exists. Most parents struggle to accept that their child is gay and attracted to the same gender. This is true of Yudi's mother, but she doesn't constantly pressure Yudi to marry due to her own enlightenment. Rao illustrates this in the first chapter when Milind asks Yudi, "What language do you speak at home?" (Rao 10). Yudi replies, "English." In India, individuals from different linguistic and cultural backgrounds hold varying views on marriage.

The author tosses the coin, enabling his readers to see both sides through his protagonist, Yudi, and Yudi’s love interest, Milind. Low self-esteem and a superiority complex are two sides of the same coin. When Milind meets Yudi for the first time, he is riddled with an inferiority complex, shame, and a negative self-image, the reasons for which could be varied. Later on, as Milind assimilates into the work culture of A.K. Modelling, his shame gradually transforms into self-confidence. Eager to see his pictures in print media, he resents Yudi, convinced that he would have never helped him reach this success despite being a pressman. The lives of gay men are often mired in complexities which contribute to enduring problems.

On Yudi’s end, the problem of anxiety and depression is notably visible. He is no different from any heterosexual lover mourning the breakup with their partner. Yudi is showcased as a isolated character with no friends to share his feelings; he often interacts with Gauri, yet a friendship never blossoms between them. There is a lack of a support system in gay life. This absence, coupled with the anxiety sparked by his separation, pushes Yudi towards mental instability. The intertwining of these factors often leads to suicidal thoughts, positioning those belonging to the LGBTQ community at an elevated risk for suicide.

Moreover, the author has created two contrasting images in front of readers through the lovers, Yudi and Milind. Yudi is characterized as one who is not ashamed of his sexuality and doesn't live his life in secrecy, but in a lively and cheerful way. He represents gays who are out of the closet and belong to the empowered section of sexual minorities, whereas Milind struggles to accept his sexual inclination. In a casual meeting, Yudi hesitantly asks his boyfriend Milind, "Tell me honestly, are you really a homosexual?" (Rao 82). In response, Milind says, "Who knows?" The conversation continues, "Do you enjoy having sex with women?" (Rao 82). This time, Milind admits, "I’ve never had sex with women, so how can I tell?"(Rao 82). This suggests that Milind is either confused about his sexual orientation or needs to explore more to identify his gender. In the closing chapter, the author reveals that gays and bisexuals can also be internally homosexual. During their first meeting, after landing from A.K. Modelling, Milind blames Yudi, saying, "It’s because of you that I became a homosexual. You are the one who ruined my life." This behavior of Milind suggests a relationship between shame and homophobia in gay men. Milind is portrayed as having low self-esteem and being doubtful. He falls prey to his parental pressure due to his concealed sexuality and marries Leela. He does not accept himself as gay or even as bisexual. Internalized homophobia is a self-loathing of someone who is gay, lesbian, bisexual, or trans and does not want to be. The reason behind this self-disliking is the negative stereotype attached to gays by religion and society. An internalized homophobic man may attempt to change his sexual orientation by consulting a psychiatrist and undergoing various reparative therapies. An internally homophobic gay man may act ultra-macho to hide the fact that he is gay. He may be aware or unaware of his sexual feelings towards people of his own gender. Nowhere in the novel does Milind admit to being gay or bisexual. He constantly presents his disagreement with being queer, despite having been intimate with Yudi and other clients of A.K. Modelling for years.

In the novel, only a few female characters are depicted: Gauri, Yudi's mother, and the housekeeper. Yudi shares a love-hate relationship with Gauri, and their friendship is rather complex. Yudi meets Gauri at Bhatnagar's office. Dressed in a white handloom sari with a golden border and a bindi, Gauri, an upcoming painter, is instantly hypnotized by Yudi. She falls in love with him. During a conversation, Gauri says, "I also know why you're unmarried" (Rao 52). The chat continues. Yudi never reveals his sexuality, but at the same time, he doesn't try to hide it from her. Yudi asks Gauri to tell him what she knows about him. Gauri responds that she is well aware of his sexual preferences: that he is attracted to members of his own sex. However, Gauri lets her imagination run wild and dreams about Yudi. She sees him as a potential husband. She assumes that all men are naturally attracted to women. Thereafter, they meet at art galleries and hotels. Gauri invites Yudi for lunch at her place and introduces him to her parents. Gauri asks, "Yudi, can't we be friends?" Yudi immediately refuses. She approaches him again and says, "I do, believe me, I do. I'd like to have a platonic relationship with you, Yudi" (Rao 62). Yudi clearly understands her intention and refuses the non-sexual relation. After several seductive and romantic failed attempts, she realizes that her dreams won't come true and that Yudi is madly in love with Milind.

Rao presents gay-straight friendships to his readers and explores their various layers in this novel. The comfort level between a gay man and a straight woman is often greater compared to friends of opposite sexes. Their friendship is more trustworthy because it is not a "friends with benefits" situation. In the beginning, Gauri's hope for a romantic relationship with Yudi hinders the growth of their friendship. However, once she realizes that there can't be a platonic love between herself and Yudi, she abandons her motives and tries to be a good friend to him. Straight women and gay men view their friendship as a safe space where they can have intimate conversations and understand each other's needs. These friends can provide each other with mental and financial support. Because both gay men and straight women are attracted to men, this may be one of the reasons for the strong bond between them. The author presents the various social issues every gay man has to confront and deal with in this novel. The book addresses how their level of education and maturity help them to cope and triumph over life's adversities. Not only the issues of bullying and love failure have to be dealt with by gays, but they also have to tackle the havoc created by straight friends and family members. In this case, it is Gauri, who constantly tries to seduce Yudi despite knowing his sexual orientation.

In her work, "The World of Homosexuals", Shakuntala Devi offers the view that physical appearance holds more sway in the realm of homosexual men beyond a certain age, compared to heterosexuals. These men often experience frustration when they can no longer attract desirable new partners, which leads them to pay for companionship in order to fulfil their desires. Heterosexual men, she argues, feel less urgency in matters of sex, as most of them marry, whereas many homosexual men remain single and unattached due to their nomadic lifestyles. Similarly, in R. Raj Rao's "The Boyfriend", an emphasis is placed on the commercialization of sex. Yudi, for example, seldom pays his casual partners, citing his youthful looks as a reason to delay such payments. Despite greying hair, he maintains a trim physique. Enter Milind, who discovers an easy way to make money by joining A.K. Modelling. There, he satisfies clients in exchange for payment. At first, he offered his affection and sexuality to Yudi in exchange for time spent together and the occasional spending money. He proceeds to do the same with the clients affiliated with the modelling agency. Interestingly, male prostitutes differ significantly from female prostitutes: they tend to view their profession as a full-time occupation, much like any regular desk job.

Apart from delving into the psychological problems faced by gay individuals, the author also highlights the risk of sexually transmitted infections. In the first chapter, Yudi stumbles upon two men engaging in oral sex in a public toilet, where the latter ends up swallowing the other's ejaculate. Yudi berates him, saying, "Idiot, haven't you heard of HIV?" (Rao 03). The man dismisses him, declaring himself safe, prompting Yudi to privately lament their ignorance. This episode goes a long way in shedding light on the negligent attitudes and behaviour of gays from different societal classes. Yudi, on the other hand, seems more risk-averse, and well informed about sexually transmitted diseases (STD). He fully comprehends the danger and advises his community on the importance of safe sex.

During his stint at A.K. Modelling, Milind frequently hears about HIV, STD, and AIDS—terms casually thrown around in conversation, even though their exact meanings are not always fully understood. The agency had a strict rule: every boy must take precautions, whether they like it or not, and even produced its own prophylactics to mitigate risk. This dominance of risk avoidance is why Milind chose to leave. Gay individuals often find themselves leading double lives, donning masks that they remove at different occasions—a method of survival in our society. Through this book, the author presents readers with a medley of complex issues that beg their consideration.

Did you like this example?

549

29