A Biblical Approach to Sex Education
Overview (25-30 minutes total)
- Introduction of the speakers & objectives of the seminar (5 minute)
- Icebreaking activity & LRS-Talk Model (10 minutes)
- Overview of the Five Key Messages (15 minutes)
Ice-breaking activities -Three questions :
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How it works
- Putting yourself into your kid’s shoes : One question they think a child / teen like theirs may have. [ We will talk about this during the overview]
- What are some challenges as parents you face when needing to talk about this topic with your children/teens?
- As you reflect on YOUR OWN dating experience and marriage, what were the areas that your parents/guardians were helpful in terms of equipping you for love, relationships, and the sexuality journey? What were the areas that you wish they could have done more of? [We will talk about this at the wrap-up session]
- Background [ Needs, challenges and how Youth program plan to address these]
- Use the key messages to frame the overview of the series on love, relationships, and sexuality
- Share how parents can partner with the church on these topics
- Ask parents to provide feedback on their concern about their teens and areas parents need help with
Discussion and wrap-up (20 minutes)
- Role-plays ( 10 minutes)
- Review the key messages and reflections from today‘s learnings.
- Important reminders:
- Healthy family relationships can promote positive self-image, have positive impact your kid‘s future relationships with others, and encourage trust and communication with parents even if the topics are difficult to talk about.
- Relying on God’s grace so none of us are perfect, but we can grow together.
- Wrap -up (Action Planning) : Identifying one thing you would like to do to address these issue
Part I. Overview
- Today’s Objectives:
- To start/re-initiate the conversation at PCAC on these important topics.
- To share several key Biblical messages and tools with parents
- To strengthen the partnership between PCAC and parents to equip our youth so they can eventually enjoy God’s gift for marriage when they are ready.
- Research has found that a person’s behavior is rooted in their personal beliefs, values and perceptions
- Guided by the behavioral science principles, here is the LRS- Talk Model that can help shape/guide your teen’s sexual behaviors:
- Define your core values and beliefs: Bible, Health, or something else.
- Evaluate and strengthen your FAMILY relationships with your teen
- Constantly convey your BIG PICTURE message(s) that through your words and actions
- Use appropriate vocabulary and your own words to talk to your kid regarding various topics (Frequent & ongoing)
Five key Biblical messages that the PCAC Youth promotes
Parents’ roles and responsibilities
Parents’ roles and responsibilities
Parents’ should talk with teens about love, relationships, and sexuality. If we don’t do it, the world WILL.
Parents should establish their role as the authority when guiding their teens on these topics.
Five Key Messages
Application- What a teen needs to know (12-18 yrs)
Love comes from God
1 John 4:19
- The world comes from God, so does family, so does love, so does sex.
- The Trinity: God is passionate, emotional, and relational
- God is passionate about a relationship with you and wants you to have loving relationships (Isa 62:5)
Putting God First
- God says “no” because there is a better “yes”
- The road less traveled is the most rewarding
- God’s way is the safest and is meant to protect you
- God doesn’t want to force you to obey, but to know Him and enjoy obedience
We are wonderfully made by God
- Your body is a beautiful gift from God to worship God and to know others
- Attraction and sexual desire are a gift from God
- Your body changing is God’s intention to bless you with new things
- You will need God’s instruction on how to best enjoy this gift from God.
- Protect the beautiful gift God has given you from both others and yourself until it is time in marriage.
- Afternote: Gender is not a spectrum, but designed by God as only male or female (Gen 5:2)
Sex is a gift from God for marriage
- Sex was designed by God as a physical representation of spiritual intimacy (Isaiah 62:5)
- God has a specific design to provide immense pleasure in marriage
- All things are permitted in the marriage bed
- Saving sexual gratification until marriage protects the marriage bed
- Afternote: Since God is the designer, sexuality should only be expressed between one biological man and one biological woman in marriage.
[* i.e., addressing questions about homosexuality*]
Dating that preserves marriage
Song of Sg 3:5
- Falling in love is a normal and wonderful thing
- Sexual desire should be anticipated, but not expressed in dating
- Having sex in dating will bring marital responsibilities in an unsafe environment
- After waiting until marriage, having sex will be phenomenal and worth the wait
- If you’ve had premarital sex, we want to lovingly lead you through redemption and healing
- Role-plays & reflections : Separate Moms & Dads
- Youth parents to practice
- What have you learned from this practice
- Identify areas that parents may need help with
- A few reminders
- Role-plays & reflections : Separate Moms & Dads
- Sex education is whole-person education and it is more than just one conversation and what a church setting can address. That’s why we need this PARTNERSHIP. (Below is just FYI)
- Biology (e.g., body parts, puberty, reproduction)
- Psychology(e.g., desire, dating, sexuality)
- Pathology (e.g., sexual diseases, problematic sexual behavior, sexual dysfunction)
- Ethics & Expectations: Gender identify & Roles, dating
- It’s good to start EARLY, but it is never too late.
- Remember the Model. Don’t know where to start? Here are four steps
- Know God / Clarify what your core values and beliefs are
- Know yourself
- Know your child
- Let your kids to know you
Rely on God’s grace — nobody’s perfect. But we can grow together in Christ.
- Action Planning — Distribute a card for family to take home and discuss.
- What does a girl want?
- Attention, affection, and affirmation
- Some ideas that parents need to know before talking to your daughter about sex
- Girls need to know that sex is not a bargaining chip or a weapon.
- Girls need different things from Mom and Dad.
- A mom’s love is primarily one for nurturing and caring for her young daughter.
- A dad’s love involves protectiveness? Help provide affirmation and security.
- When Mom or Dad is missing, girls need other role models.
- Girls need to see how men and women are supposed to relate to each other.
- Girls need to know that the cost of sexual misbehavior usually hits them harder than it does boys.
- Girls need to know that pornography is off-limits to them, too.
- Girls need to find their worth in their relationship with God.
- The Making of a Man
- In general, boys at all ages desire adventure, conquest, and competition.
- What boys need to complete his journey to masculine maturity:
- Reformation- Boys want to take things apart and put them back together again. [ Mom needs to let them do this, and dads need to show them how]
- Mental competence – help them understand different kinds of “smarts”
- Physical confidence
- Discipline – They need to learn discipline and self-control
- Challenge – They need good role models and mentors.
- Acceptance and respect
- Family matters
- Mom can nurture a boy and meet his physical and emotional needs during the early years. Mom can also help a boy to understand a woman’s perspective.
- Dad can and should instill standards of appropriate behavior toward girls and women. Dads are uniquely qualified to help their boys to understand the world around them, and become comfortable in their own skin.
- Simple Truths: Group study by Mary Flo Ridely available for PCAC members from RightNow media
- Focus on the Family Guide to Talking with Your Kids about Sex: The Honest Answers for Every Age – Revised
- What’s the Big Deal? – Why God cares about sex by Stan and Brenna Jones ( This series’ Book 3)
- How to Talk to Your Children about Homosexuality- A Guide for Parents by Jeff Johnston
- ????GPS — ????
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- Straight Talk with Your Kids About Sex, by Josh and Dottie McDowell
- Every Young Man’s Battle, by Steven Arterburn
- Every Young Woman’s Battle, by Shannon Ethridge
- 7 Lessons to Introduce Your Child to Biblical Sexuality, by Luke Gilkerson
- The Diamond Marriage, by Simon Vibert
- LRS: Talking with Youth about Sex (12-18yrs old)