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As an international student, I came to US when I was 16 for a better education system. Before that I was suffering under Chinese education system. After I experienced Chinese and US education system, I knew I made a right choice for myself and my family. Comparing to US, a freer education system, Chinese education is a cage which binding the parents, teachers and students’ happiness of life. In China, everyone experienced students’ unhappiness. There are so many people who care about your life and study since childhood, all for a future goal. In a word, you must work hard, or you will be sorry for your father, mother, grandfather, grandmother, and so on. From school to home, the schedule is full, with endless homework, exams and cram schools to fill the remaining gaps. You are placed in various subjects, projects, and competition with peers around you.
Even if you are good, there are always a few areas of competition will teach you a hard lesson: sorry you are not good enough. And those who cannot win all areas of the mediocre talents of children, is hit to doubt themselves, doubt life. You are depressed, depressed, cannot lift the strength, only think of the game, the network world to comfort themselves. However, around so many people look covetously, guard against death guard, think about it again, today there are so many homework has not been completed, tomorrow there are more things waiting for you you can only force yourself to learn. Only mental passivation can help you. The more numb, the less sensation, the more adaptive. Along with it, it is not surprising that parents are unhappy as well.
How it works
From accompanying your child to the early education class, learning English, painting and piano, you devote yourself to studying how to give your child a better education. You buy a school district house, spend money, support relationships, squeeze the head also want to put the child into a good school. Taking care of your child’s diet and daily life is not a problem. The most important thing is that you should accompany your child to do homework and care about every exam. Your child is buffeted by competition, and you are buffeted by lateral comparisons. On weekends, you take your child to and from cram schools to give him or her a competitive edge. Living without night or weekend for more than ten years is the exclusive treatment of Chinese parents. You think your child should know what you’re doing because you’re putting up a lot of blood.
But he is more and more unhappy, more and more lack of vitality, to you also gradually indifferent, far away. Children are not happy, then they blame parents and teachers put too much pressure onto children. Parents are not happy, then they blame children are not sensible, blame the teacher should not put responsibility onto parents. So, the teacher is not happy, then who is to blame? People envy teachers for having two holidays, However, a typical middle school head teacher needs to work every day from 7:30 am to 9:30 pm, a full 14 hours. That translates into an eight-hour work week (five days a week, excluding the two months of summer and winter), equivalent 17 months of extra work per year. At the beginning, I complained that the teachers arranged the test too closely. Now I think about it: as many tests as we take, they will give us as many questions and correct as many exams. Don’t they have their own ideas about education? Don’t they want to be more flexible and interesting? But step by step, they must follow the system. The most afraid of the night mobile phone rings, can not be which child has not come home? Which child hasn’t returned to the dormitory yet? Students, parents, teachers are all not happy. Chines education, when did it get into a such horrible trouble? If you succeed in one subject after another, can you have a good future? Do you have a good future only if you win the exams one by one? I have interviewed one of my friend’s mother.
My friend is successful on designing clothing. Her mother said that my friend was not a good student from a common sense. However, she never really blamed her. She always encouraged her daughter to learn things she is interested in. After my friend finished high school, her mother sent her to an international school to learn clothing design. My friend worked hard and spent only three years to finish a four-year program.
The uniform she designed has been used for a five stars hotel. She is lucky. Although she is not talent, but she earned patience and understanding from her parents, which is lack of among most Chinese parents. Then she had a unique pathway to create her life. Most of us have heard a story about Cinderella. She wants to attend prince’s dancing party.
However, her step mother threw a handful of peas into the ashes and asked her to pick them all up before she could go to the party in order to stopper her to attend. She must do it. Fortunately, angle and birds helped her. No matter parents or teachers try not to play the actor as the stepmother. Don’t push children to pick up peas. All the educator should help children to pick up peas, to help children tailor dresses, and help children to discover and attend that most important ball. The mother I interviewed is my friend’s angle, bird who helped her picking up peas.
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